


Riding a Broom

by SnowTime



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling, 僕のヒーローアカデミア | Boku no Hero Academia | My Hero Academia
Genre: Crack, Crossover, Gen, Master of Death Harry Potter
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-02-28
Updated: 2018-10-16
Packaged: 2019-03-25 06:54:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 8,778
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13828854
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SnowTime/pseuds/SnowTime
Summary: His life was like a fairy tale, one that hasn't ended yet because he was still moving on.He quietly entered this new world, and made life both easier and harder for some people."Fix this Potter.""What, not even a greeting?"





	1. World, Meet Harry

Harry entered the world silently, phasing into existence like an aloof cloud that drifted aimlessly. His legs dangled from the broom he was sitting on, his green eyes taking in the new world he had entered.

Blue skies.

Large, modern buildings.

And last but not least, many people.

All in all, it looked like a very normal world to relax in. But one cannot take things at just face value.

He guided his broom to fly lower and saw that the people looked well, like most people. (There were a few worlds he went to where blue skin was normal. He got used to stranger things eventually.)

Once he was at a height where people started to notice him and look at him in surprise, he felt a bit more anticipation. People did not look at him in the fear and shock he was expecting, which meant that there were far stranger things in this seemingly normal looking world—

Oh, would you look at that, that man has horns? There also seems to be a child sneezing fire over there… 

“My, what a strange yet normal world.” Was Harry’s commentary for his short observation.

He vaguely heard a child making comments on his attire and appearance, which was to be expected.

“Mom, he’s dressed like a wizard! He has a pointy hat, robes and he’s even riding a broom! What kind of quirk is that?” A somewhat squeaky and high pitched voice broke through all the other noises.

“Now now honey, it’s rude to point.” A gentle warm voice chastised the child.

His lips quirked up in a smile. Occasionally he would feel like dressing up as the very representation of a wizard–not that all worlds have the same stereotypes for wizards–and he would relax and play around in a world. He pushed his pointy hat a bit higher and took out a wand from his robes–the Elder Wand. 

Being immortal has strange effects on a person. You either lose yourself, or you keep yourself and gain more. His worries, apprehension and all the other things that gave him a very fiery temper and inclination to trouble slowly melted away into something more… inhumane? When he found out that fairy tales weren’t all just fairy tales, he had been shocked, he had been angry, and most of all worried. (Those myths and legends about anything immortal don’t sound nice at all.)

When his generation started to pass by, when  _ Ginny _ passed away, he didn’t feel the grief and hurt he was expecting… like something important that made him human was eroded away. He never told anyone his status and lived quietly, slowly stepping out of the limelight. His body still aged like normal, but his very soul was no longer the same. At night when he slept, he would be  _ somewhere. _ He didn’t know where, but every time people would walk past him, never seeing him and just kept walking toward  _ something. _ Eventually he realized it was the afterlife they were heading to.

Vague feelings and thoughts would slowly make their way into his mind and he found himself losing more and more… empathy. (All things were meant for death, it was just one more.) 

Strangely he did not worry and still lived on like normal. (Is this how it feels to achieve Nirvana?  It certainly felt like it.)

Death was impartial, and one couldn’t be impartial if they held too many feelings after all right? 

When he physically died, he went very quietly in his sleep. His soul lingered a while longer to take a long look at everything else before he was pulled away by the flow. (Of what? He did not know).

Worlds went by, times went by. He met many other representations of death that much like himself, were bound to become balancers. (Oh yes, Death gotta balance all of those Life. Overpopulation is a serious problem, oh Merlin.)

They didn’t really need to do anything, just float around and not get caught and be forced to do some strange things by other immortals. Gods know what kind of universally devastating things would happen if everything becomes unbalanced.

But enough about his backstory, he has a child to entertain.

He raised his Elder Wand and slowly waved it. Sparks of light gently fell down to the amazement of the child and other audience.

“As a souvenir for meeting me.” He conjured a little marble necklace, different flashes of stars flitted through the little thing and floated it down. Something like that he could make and give away, but things like good luck charms and whatnot, nope. Gotta keep the balance, Harry Potter Shall Not Be The One To Bug The World. Though his very appearance was already like a bug in the system. He will personally not hack and make more bugs that will break the game (world).

(A very small memory of a legendary sword that defeated all evil nudged his mind and he kicked it away. Nope, he did nothing before. He, Harry Potter was innocent of such deed!)

(A couple other balancers that had to help do clean up work gave him middle fingers.)

One can have no empathy, but trying to have fun will still bury a person into trouble… 

He was at least still pretty sane and normal compared to some really old people… like trolls. 

Harry mentally coughed away his drifting attention again and faded away in the air. Everyone stared at the place the very strange wizard(?) was at.

“Is that a new hero?”

“That’s going to be quite cool.”

(“Oh, hero? This is a superhero world? Hm, do I still have my hero complex?”)

———

Harry drifted around aimlessly to explore this new world. It was far more advanced than his original world, but not so overly so it looked all sci-fi with invading aliens. He gathered a lot more background information on the world at the same time as he had fun. 

Hell, he didn’t even have to change out of his wizard clothes. (Though he was warned and chased a few times by some other heroes when he was caught riding his broom. Something about using quirks isn’t allowed? What? Are you kidding? Got cool powers but no permission to use it?)

As of right now, he was being tagged along by someone. A guy with shaggy, long black hair, a scarf, and a serious case of dry eyes. Overall, the way he dressed looked pretty gloomy too, not that he could say that about someone else when he was pretty sure he went through a teenage angst and emo phase too.

He looked back down at the guy following him and was rewarded with a wide-eyed glare and the other man’s hair suddenly floating up.

Using the information of this world, this man had to be using his quirk.

The sad part was, for Harry, besides seeing some nice new not-as-emo hairdo, it seems to have no other effect.

“What?” The man choked out when he saw Harry was perfectly fine sitting on his broom and floating there. “Is that some kind of new technology?” But the broom looked very, very normal. It was the person that didn’t look normal.

“Oh, did your quirk have another effect besides giving you a new hairdo?” Let it be known that Harry is not cheeky on purpose. He really wasn’t.

“It was.” The man gave up whatever he was doing and his hair went back to normal. Pity, he actually looked cool.

“Are you one of those heroes?” Harry looked him up and down, this guy didn’t really look like one, not that he was one to pick at when he still looked pretty damn weak. Wizards and witches were pretty weak physically when you think about it though. A macho wizard… would be a great sight to see. A macho any women be they muggle or witch would be a shocker. 

“What is your name?” Lucky for them to be in a place without much people. It was time for Q and A. 

“It’s Harry, what’s yours?” He guided his broom to a nearby ice cream stand and bought some. (What, the money? He fixed up a few places that villains broke and was paid. Reparo was a great spell. Now how he, a wizard that technically was no longer a wizard could still use spells like he was alive was not his problem.)

“British?” The man didn’t give away his name.

“Hmmm.” 

It was truly the start of a beautiful partnership. 

(“He certainly saves people a lot of time and money. He technically doesn't cause me a lot of trouble but I still feel like I have a lot of things to deal with.”)

(“Love you too Shota.”)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's not really a serious story...


	2. Is That A Villain I Hear?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> And bad luck makes itself known.

Starting from their very normal first meeting, the two got along well.

("Can't find you in the databases, so got to watch over you." A certain someone muttered.)

("Not surprising, not every day you meet someone from another world." He sipped his tea quietly.)

("Someone go find someone with a quirk that deals with dimensions!" Another person yelled.)

Yes, they got along fabulously and everything went great.

He had to give these guys some brownie points, they adapt to things fast. Already, this guy was used to ordering around Harry like he was some magical fix-it-all glue.

"Fix this Potter."

"What, not even a greeting?"

This became their normal banter after they found out Harry really was a magical fix-it-all glue, at least for the inorganic stuff that only broke into pieces and not like, burned to crisp. (Just fixing things is fine, he's not breaking the universe just doing that.)

Harry dutifully cast a Reparo on a building that looked like it was stepped on by a giant–it probably was. Bystanders watched and gasped in amazement as pieces of the building just started to fly and all magically piece itself together.

"Thank you Wizard!" The owner of the building burst out into tears. If it was fixed through normal means, the construction would have taken a lot of time and money. So the owner really had a lot of reasons to shed tears of joy.

Harry wasn't really a hero, but after the few times he had to follow out Aizawa to do his hero work, and he offhandedly fixed a couple places, people had taken to calling him that. Well, since he was dressed as a Wizard and he was born as one… it was a bit of a boring name though?

"Potter!"

Ah, he was starting to float off again.

"I should tie a rope or something on your broom if you keep drifting off." The sleepy looking hero squinted at him with more than a bit of annoyance.

"That would be quite offending so I would rather not." A man holding a rope while leading a flying broom carrying a wizard… was such a beautiful scene he could cry.

But Harry stopped getting lost in his own thoughts and followed after Aizawa into the normal hero agency building. They would stop by occasionally to fill in paperwork while Harry just napped until the man was done with whatever he needed to do.

But this time, before he could fall into nap time he was called out.

"Potter, catch." A little white something was thrown to him. He reflexively caught it and looked at it… Hero ID Card?

"What's this for? You know I can't fight." Harry waved the little card around.

"You can just do your usual. We're not expecting you to fight or anything." Well, that was very informative.

"We went through a lot of trouble to get it for you pass the usual channels. So, the restriction of it is that you actually can't fight against Villains. You're for support after battles." Aizawa continued to explain as they walked out of the building and this time, headed in another direction Harry was used to.

"The school is also going to open soon, so mass destruction is to be expected." Aizawa grouched in his lazy yet menacing way that managed to express all his disdain toward and unwillingness to deal with any more work.

"Oh, right, we're out of beef today." Harry cut off Aizawa from grouching anymore and was rewarded with a glare.

"You ate it all?" Very direct, though yes, yes he did. Aizawa didn't even bother to wait for an answer.

"Let's go."

Despite all that doom and gloomy known as Aizawa Shota, he was very kind beneath all of that.

"You're paying for it yourself."

Well, most of him was.

Oh well, it's not like he's lacking in money.

—

Shopping markets were the same no matter which world you go to. People would snatch things in a hurry to hit all the best bargains.

The most dangerous shopping market to ever end up in would be in a zombie infested world of course.

Housewives of all ages passed by grabbing things and staring at others with so much intensity if items could blush, they would. (Harry debated turning them all semi-alive for a short five minutes. But a quick look at the forever-sleepy Aizawa dispelled that idea.)

Right at that moment–because Villains have great timing–a loud scream sounded from behind them. Followed that was a series of evil laughter and more destruction sounds.

Very much exasperated and annoyed, Aizawa dealt with them quickly all the while muttering to himself: "The number of times I run into side jobs is really increasing."

An explanation from one Harry Potter: "I have bad luck, it usually follows me and the people around me." Aizawa had first-hand experience ever since then.

After the villains were dealt with and handed over to the defenders of law enforcement judgment (police), Aizawa turned to him. "Potter, I should really hand you off to someone else."

Harry shrugged, this was not the first time this hero said so to him. He motioned for his bag of goods he bought while the villains were dealt with and decided to no longer tempt fate. He apparated them both home.

Aizawa woozily stood for a moment but did not fall. The man once compared the feeling to being drunk or having a hangover. It was a very appropriate comparison in Harry's humble opinion.

The first time he did it to the man without warning, he was lectured quite a bit and was exposed to some very scary expressions. (This man was a hidden sadist. He bet all his remaining luck on it.)

But the usage of apparition was approved, even though it was a crappy way to travel due to the unpleasant feelings it left behind. He threw himself onto the couch and waved the man off.

"Pepper steak with onion." He buried himself deeper into the soft cushion as he said what he wanted.

"Make it yourself, don't you have magic?" Aizawa retorted with much sarcasm toward his appearance as a wizard.

"Magic doesn't solve everything." And indeed, it didn't because he was still the one to make dinner. That man can make some good threats, empty threats, but still good threats nonetheless.

"If you dare to add that bottle of hot sauce…"

Damn it, prank caught.

Aizawa Shota, a pro-hero of great power had a rather rough week.

First was the appearance of a real-life Wizard apparently from another world.

They had put him under so many lie detection quirks it was something that could not be denied any longer.

("My dad was a stag, my godfather a dog.")

("Er, it seems to be true?")

("What do you mean it seems to be true?!")

The wizard himself made a lovely black cat at least. Ha, witches with their black cats, this was a wizard who was his own black cat. And the man himself was rather like a black cat, bad luck and all packaged together with a nice, lovely green ribbon.

("I'll have you know, Black was prestigious!")

("Doesn't deny the fact that you bring bad luck.")

("Bloody morons.")

(Were they not talking about the color black?)

Which therefore leads to the second problem: bad luck.

Harry wasn't kidding about bad luck, the number of villains in any area he appeared in upped exponentially while other places went down like they were drawn to him.

He had became so much more intimate with the local police after seeing them around three times a day. And they, were so exasperated to see them every time and always upped their vigilance when they were in the area.

Case point, the current situation before them was quite a disaster.

"Oh, so, you see, it's either a lot of pesky minor annoyances or a big shot when things go quiet for a while." Harry made a 'teehee' expression he had just recently learned from some movies in hopes of downplaying everything.

Aizawa turned his very dry gaze to him then back to the blazing fire hazard from behind the crowds. From the chattering of the people, it was some kind of slime guy that had taken a child hostage, a child with a very strong fire-type quirk, hence all the fire and explosions…

"Fix this Potter."

"No can do, it technically isn't my fault. I can get rid of the fire, but I can't fix things that were burned." Nor could he fight since he technically wasn't supposed to do direct meddling with fate. Though his very presence was a screw thrown into how the world was normally supposed to run.

Aizawa heaved a sigh. So he still has to fight on his day off, because all the other heroes aren't very compatible with the current situation… though with how the Villain is a slime guy, his quirk wasn't too useful against a Mutant type either.

"Don't worry so much, it's not his time to die yet." Harry comforted him. It didn't do much to help ease the tension which shot up even higher when another child jumped in.

"Oh, he reminds me of my good old Gryffindor days." Fondness stemmed from his words.

Those were not comforting words.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And the plot bunny continues...


	3. Testing Mic One Two Three~

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The meeting of Shota's best friend and his new class

Harry’s meeting with Aizawa’s best friend was rather epic.

Though it was still funny to him how the most gloom and doom guy he met so far has such a  _ loud _ friend. The complete opposite of Aizawa, filled with drama, gossip and sunshine.

Boy, was he filled with drama, gossip and sunshine.

“Hello, my dear wizard friend, my name is Yamada Hizashi, my hero name is Present Mic!” the blond man had said with all the flare of an announcer ready to break dance or blow out some eardrums. 

Harry had to blink a few times, look back at Aizawa to make sure this was his best friend (and not some fraud), and look back at the blond.

“You are not what I was expecting when Aizawa said his best friend was coming.” Harry gave the man a wide grin after the shock wore off.

“Oh lord, if it weren’t for me, who knows how sad his life would be!” Yamada sighed loudly and shrugged, which was mimicked by Harry as they both smirked toward the grouching Aizawa. 

“Enough of you two making a racket by the entrance, come in.” Aizawa glared.

And as they say it, the rest was history.

(“God, you pranked him? There is always one way to get that guy out of his bad mood though. He loves cats.”)

(“May I present you, my squishy paws.”)

(“Shota, this guy can turn into a cat, just marry him.”)

(“Want me to kick both of you out?”)

What a lovely bloke he was.

———

“My bestest friend in the world, Your All Mighty Lord Wizard Harry, would you do a kind favor for me, and join me on my adventure today in guiding young souls?!” Hizashi completely disregarded Shota’s stink eye as he acted out in a very dramatic way to invite Harry to the Entrance Exam for new students. 

“Entrance exam?” Harry looked up from his ice cream, his face full of glee. Now, no one likes to take it, but watching someone else suffer over it? It was their privilege of being the older generation. 

“Yup.” Hizashi popped a scoop of his own ice cream into his mouth. “Our U.A. entrance exam isn’t open for the public or anything, but Shota needs to keep an eye on you as per orders, so you get front row seats in the grading room!” 

“Is it the same exam every year?” Harry levitated his empty cup into the trash can. 

Hizashi sighed, “The core idea of it is, it’s a rather unfair exam on those whose quirks aren’t flashy—like me and Shota—or whose quirks don’t work on nonliving beings you know? But the system is in place and things are hard to change to accommodate everyone.” 

Harry raised an eyebrow, “So what is it?”

The other leaned in and whispered, and a Harry had to whistle.

“You guys are hardcore aren’t you? Reminds me of that time we had a tournament and one of the things we had to do was steal a fake egg from dragons.”

“Wait what?! I keep forgetting you’re technically an alien...” 

“When the broom and pointy hat doesn’t remind you of it anymore, I got to jog your memory with something.” 

“If you two are done, we’re leaving.” And Shota, the joy-killer as always dragged them away before they tempted fate too long. 

———

The front row seats to the exam proved entertaining for Harry. First, we got Lord Boom-They-All-Must-Die destroying everything in sight with enough murderous rage that he would be instant labeled with the Death Eater tag. Poor-Boy-Eyebags who clearly did not like the exam but was making a last ditch effort of at least getting into the school. Then, there was I-Got-Too-Much-Gas little green boy whose very power left him half dead. Has he mentioned how it looked like everyone in the room looked a bit concerned at his mental wellbeing as he rattled off nicknames and more horror stories from good ole Hoggie days? (Remind him, just who named Hogwarts again, and why.)

Shota looked like he had enough of him and was mentally strangling him. Except Harry was a bit too tiny to be strangled properly right now.

Yeah, too tiny.

Palm-Sized Harry has taken place by Shota’s shoulder. As it was a grading room, with many people and thus limited space, Harry decided to not try his luck squeezing in there with a broom floating around. At least not full sized. His current sprite size was doing him great favors in not destroying property by accidentally bumping into things. 

Not that he wasn’t annoying. He was always annoying. Powerful people all have a little mental something missing, it’s a price to pay for power. (Like how Shota always need sleep and has a serious case of dry eye.)

“Ah, that grandma. That’s an interesting ability. She must have a lot of interesting stories with it.” They were now at the end of the exam and watching kids being patched up and sent on their merry (or depressing) way. “I still wish I went with Hizashi though. I would be a nice sidekick.” 

“No.” Shota mercilessly shot him down like he did the past few complaints. Mini Harry sighed, then went to bug the principal again. He had nice fur. 

———

“Hero-Complex and Time-Bomb are in your class?” Harry peered at Shota’s list of students, raising an eyebrow at this… very explosive combination. (Then there was the profile picture of an invisible girl…) 

A grouchy Shota managed a “Yes” out as he continued to huddle in his sleeping bag, waiting for school to start in the staff office. Harry was still in mini size. Shota, finding him much easier to deal with while tiny, had him stay in such a size as long as they were out for the most part. Harry didn’t really mind, he could jump into cake and stuff and do a literal milk bath. He could even squeeze into the sleeping bag or Shota’s scarf when he felt like it.

The pitter patter of footsteps soon disrupted the silence as students tried to find their way around school to their classes. Harry stared down at the caterpillar that was a still unwilling to move Shota and waved his wand at him, levitating him out of the office and heading for the classroom. (If he got lost a few times… well, no harm done.)

By the time they got to the classroom, it sounded like a storm was brewing. Silently getting through the door, Shota finally opened his dried eyes, taking in the situation and interrupting whatever was going on.

Harry nodded as everyone ran off to change, the man truly was a sadist. 

“You didn’t let me introduce myself.” Harry moped. 

“You can cause your trouble later.” The teacher dragged himself out to wait for his potential-students. 

“Can I go see Hizashi’s class?” 

“No. He’s probably already blown out their eardrums, they don’t need you added in the mix.” 

Well, the tired hero never said when was later. 

———

The test was full of tears, determination,  _ friendship power _ , and had he mentioned tears? Well, to be more specific, it was only one little guy that gushed too much tears. 

(Shota used Harry as ball retrieval, Harry has to give this guy points with how he makes him do things. That one ball that went out to space though… no one was expecting that ball back.) 

And after fixing broken tools and torn up grounds, finally, someone asked who he was. It was that girl that fired the ball with the cannon she personally made. Wasn’t that amazing? Imagine throwing her back into ancient times with no technology. Better than throwing him back in time, all he has is magic, that can’t advance anything but maybe start another witch hunt. 

“I am Harry Potter, local wizard and alien, nice to meet you all.” Shota took over the explanation of the who, what, how and whys while Harry set himself in a staring match with ‘Kacchan’. 

Harry just had to blurt out: “I’m not very delicious.”

“HUUUHHHH?!” 

Triggering people was fun. Although ‘Deku’ looked like he was about to die from constipation from his triggering of Kacchan. 

Heh.

Oh, is that All Might hiding in the corner like a girl with a crush he sees? 

Based on Shota’s stink eye over there he sees him too. 

And based on the logic of the universe concerning the child of fate and the such, he must be worried about Deku. After all, who was the most unfortunate one so far in this class? 

(And life in general considering the Slime from before.)

Midoriya, and his… rival(?) archenemy, Katsuki.

Man, this reminds him of his relationship with Malfoy. 

Therefore there must be a Voldemort version running around somewhere! 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's short~ And I think it turned more crackish. I can only write crack at this rate...


	4. V For Voldy, M For Maso—Mighty

“Aizawa, you liar!” Was the first thing that came out of All Might’s mouth as the other walked by. His traditional smile worked just as well as any deadpan face. Harry raised a hand in greeting.

This was not the first time he met this blood-coughing hero; their first meeting was rather interesting as he watched the man deflate like a balloon in the staff room and the first thing that popped into Harry’s mind and therefore out of his mouth was: 

“Do you need a fairy in a bottle?” Harry could pretty much see the question marks in All Might’s eyes.

“I’m not exactly a fairy but I can put myself into a bottl-” Shota grabbed him and stuffed him into his pocket. He did not do so gently. 

“Don’t mind him, he’s getting strange ideas after playing Zelda with Hizashi the past few days.”  

Harry protested. “It was a good joke! I was just trying to use my newfound knowledge of this world’s culture to fit in!” 

“Your references are getting you nowhere but my pocket. Want me to seal you in a jar and boil you for a couple hours?” The look in Shota’s eyes were getting darker as his smile stretched wider. Harry wisely kept quiet.

But back to current events, All Might was almost bursting with pride as he talked about Midoriya. And man, Shota really knows how to shut people down! What about the man’s hopes and dreams? 

(Shota: They were eaten by the physical and metaphysical existence known as Reality.)

Harry silently noted All Might down for some Dandere tendencies and Deredere tendencies. As for Shota, his opinion of his Kuudere-ness has been reinforced. 

_ ‘There’s nothing crueler than letting a dream end midway.’  _

Is that a point for Tsundere too? 

These japanese stereotypes are rather fun. 

———

Harry Potter was witnessing a confession. A very heart pounding confession filled with shouting matches, insecurity issues, oaths of the future and tears. (This sounds like a proposal now.) 

It’s like a Romeo and Juliet play with Romeo having a bad temper and too much Tsun toward Juliet and Juliet trying to man up and Dere up the Tsun in Romeo… 

(It’s the evolution of a Pichu that harms itself with its own electricity into Pikachu!) 

(And the Charizard that evolved too fast with no control then got beaten down by other Charizards!) 

_ ‘These two have serious issues man.’ _ Harry would had spied on the Deku-Kacchan pair longer if not for a certain teacher that desperately wanted to go home as soon as possible. 

As they left the school, Harry felt a tingle as he crossed the gates.

“I have a bad feeling for tomorrow.”

Shota instantly had his phone out and calling the principal. He had enough of Harry’s ‘bad feelings’. He was getting a good night’s sleep tonight or die trying. 

Tomorrow’s problem he can handle tomorrow, he just needs to report it to the people that have to deal with it first.

Employee benefits. 

———

Shota was met with one of the things he hated the most as he went to work the day after.

A crowd of people. A crowd of people holding cameras, notepads and microphones. The bane of his underground hero existence.

“Media. Great, I blame you.” Shota spoke with all the fierceness of a flat pancake. Meaning, none, he has no energy for anything in the morning. 

“Um, about All Might…” A female journalist pushed her microphone forward a bit awkwardly. Anyone would feel awkward under the scruffy man’s thousand-mile deadpan stare. It was a mastered skill he had since childhood. The other students did not get away as scott free as him as he pushed and shooed them away with the gesture and a few words. 

As he walked away, he got an angry outburst about his scruffiness. Harry popped out from his scarf, staring at the scene left behind pensively. 

“Hm…. My bad feeling tingle is going off even more… There should be more than just that.”

“I already had enough of today.” If he slouched a bit more than usual no one can point it out. 

That journalist who had to be a newbie thankfully tried to cross the line and set off the alarms. The media was truly a pain. 

“I really hate the media too. Half the time they write all this nonsense from what you said and make their own spin on it.” For once, the two were in agreement about something.

What was up next in class was the Aizawa-sensei special bland criticism that was deader than the fish they ate last night. He’s kinda like a textbook personified. Just a great deal more onpoint, blunt and scary. 

———

“Bubble-gum?” There was a pause as people thought over the roll-call name and Mineta tentatively raised a hand. 

“Here?” 

“Starwars?” 

The only one space related in any way… “Here!” Uraraka spoke with full belief it was her and heaved a relief when Harry checked her off.

“Why am I doing this again?” Harry muttered but their actual teacher remained dead to the world in his sleeping bag. 

“Mario?” Uh… people thought real hard. Mario has mushrooms? Flowers? Fire?

Todoroki raised his hand very slowly and immediately put it back down once Harry checked him off. 

“Bob-omb?” Everyone immediately stared at Katsuki who shoved down all the indignity he was suffering and raised a han-middle finger. 

“Sailor Moon.” No one got that one so Harry pointed at Iida who flailed a little around. 

“Index.” There was only one person in class as unfortunate as the main character of that series. And so the roll calling went on.

Aizawa-sensei finally woke up after their brutal ego-punishment and announced their first, very normal homeroom activity: Choosing their Class Rep! 

Harry looked rather amused when they all relaxed and got a bit rowdy. “I can make a pop quiz right now if you prefer?” 

“No thank you!” 

Nothing better to cool things down like a pile of papers to work on.

———

“I blame this on you.” The big bad feeling of the day finally manifested itself in the form of the media storming the school and causing panic all around.

Harry merrily made bubble-shaped birds to harass the media a bit as he denied the blame.

“It wasn’t me~ It’s all because of the child of fate~” Harry half sung it as they slowly herded the media out and away. 

Shota wasn’t buying it. “It is human nature to blame others. Since you are the most convenient target near me, I blame you.” 

“I bet you my hat, that even if I weren’t here things would happen.” Shota glanced toward him.

“Who are you pointing your finger at?” He was finally taking it a bit more seriously as the media was gone and out of hearing range.

Harry shrugged. “What did they come here for? All Might.” The other man tched. The big oaf causes trouble everywhere. Harry continued in a drawl. “And what is All Might? The greatest hero of all right?”

“The Villains…” 

“Time to meet Voldy~!” 

“What, should I prepare holy water and purified salt.” Shota bit back sarcastically.

“You probably should, these guys are probably harder to kill than actual mold.” Harry retorted back in the same manner. 

“I did not sign up for this.” Shota slinked back into school while Harry patted him in a comforting way.

“Life throws a lot of pop quizzes doesn’t it?” 


	5. Chapter 5: Abuse the BUG

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> BUG = Basically Unwanted Glitch (I made this up, it doesn't stand for anything to my knowledge but it does mean that.)

Harry hadn’t wanted to come, since he was 100% sure something was going to happen. But his minder was Shota so he was shoved into his pocket and brought along the trip.

And true to the logic of action-based universes, a mini or major event has happened to promote the main character and his party members. 

(“I am the main character!” Tomura had shouted out angrily like an overly spoiled child throwing a temper.)

(“Indeed, you have the tragic background down and fit the anti-hero stereotype character, you also have great plot armor. BUT, you don’t have enough mini events going on around you! You’re the one creating mini events for the main character!” Harry had replied just as passionately much to the irritation of Shota.)

(And of course, the major-mini event happened while they had their argument of who and what made a main character in the form of most of the class being tossed to the sharks and scattered to the winds.)

“Harry, turn a bit bigger.” Shota whispered. Harry did as he was told and barely managed out a “Why” before he was grabbed then tossed straight at someone’s face.

Now, what happens when Invincible Mode Harry hits OP Mode Nomu? Harry wins.  _ Of course. _

“Hey! Although my Durability is Infinity, I am not a baseball!” Harry protested as the Nomu stood back up after being knocked down. 

“What do you do when you find a bug in-game that does good things?” Shota yelled and dodged around the villains. 

“Uh, abuse it? Before the admins find out and hopefully not ban my account.” Harry rubbed his chin thoughtfully and yelped when he was grabbed by a scarf and tossed  _ again _ , into the Nomu.

“Goddamn it, I understand the logic now, but it does not mean I am happy!” Harry was now being held in both hands by the Nomu, who was attempting  _ really hard _ to tear him into two and splatter all his guts and bodily fluid on the ground.

Since the Nomu had no working brain (it had a brain, one out in the open that clearly didn’t work), it didn’t realize that no matter how much it pulled and powered up its muscles, Harry will not turn into Horror-Story-Mode Harry.

Shota was truly abusing the “Harry cannot fight loophole” very well. Throwing him at someone without brain cells as a metaphorical ‘chew toy’ wasn’t Harry’s fault at all. He was just chilling there while watching Shota do his work from an extra front row seat. 

So when the students arrived, the fight wasn’t over. Shota was getting quite tired and Harry was getting a front seat row unintentionally occupying the trump card of the villains, who said villain was being dealt with by Shota and so had temporarily been rendered gagged by Shota’s scarf. 

(Well, even when Tomura tried to call Nomu over for help, it would toss Harry aside - which Shota grabbed and used as live meatshield - so that was still a stalemate.)

(“This is abuse!”)

(“Yes, and I will probably get a pretty bad punishment.” The mental sanity of Shota had decreased a lot in the presence of Harry.)

By the time All Might made his way in like the superhero he was, the sight was so strange he couldn’t muster out his normal greeting. His smile strained while his mouth remained in the shape of the greeting that has not been spoken.

Harry waved, which snapped All Might out of his stupor and let the main event continue.

(As the main antagonist, of course Tomura escaped successfully.) 

Shota just fell sideways once he determined he wasn’t needed. He was a bit physically overspent, but still crawled back up once the rest of their backup arrived.

“I am not paid enough for this.” Shota sighed once they got the students checked over and was sitting in a car back to the school.

“Most of the humans on earth aren’t paid enough in general.” Harry added in his own nugget of wisdom.

———

The next day, students obtained a day off to heal their injured body and minds from the event.

Although the students were free from further work, that did not mean the staff of the school were. 

Shota, pretty free of any major injuries and mainly just sore and drained, dragged himself to the meeting room with Harry still snoring. He wasn’t snoring for much longer when tossed under the gazes of several Pro Heroes. (The look in the principal’s eyes was pretty trauma-inducing.)

As the meeting got started, besides Shota being chastised a bit - but given much leeway because emergency times calls for emergency measures - they used Harry as a gauge of how likely something bad was going to happen any time soon  _ again _ .

(The answer was no, nothing bad is going to happen after such a major one for a short while.)

And then they moved on to talking about the Sports Festival, that yes, they were still going to do it as a show of confidence and all the security they were going to hire.

(“Does the festival have giant robots too?”)

(“Yup!”)

And Harry Potter was their warning signal.

Fix-it-all Harry into Warning-signal Harry. Is this an upgrade? They don’t really seem to be on the same spectrum, so a variant evolution?

Meanwhile, All Might continued to look apologetically at Harry and Shota throughout the meeting and brought out a cake box at the end of it. Shota stared at him like was some alien with much more meaningful annoyance (because All Might was the cause of all troubles in his current teaching career) but accepted it grudgingly.

Trouble will come for troublesome people, one should not judge and fault them for flaws they cannot control.

  * Aizawa Shota and his opinion of All Might after an upgrade.



(“If I didn’t know what was going on I would have thought this was a confession.” Harry commented next to Hizashi.)

(“If any girls confess to Shota it will probably go like this.” Hizashi nodded and sighed helplessly.)

(“Die.” Shota replied earnestly using Kacchan’s trademark threat.)

———

Side Story 1: Unintentional Counterfeiting 

“Hey, Harry,” Hizashi was cutting into a luxurious steak Harry had made. “Where are you getting the money to afford all of this food? I’m pretty sure your paycheck hasn’t come in yet.”

Shota slowly ate, uncaring or ignoring the conversation. He can worry about future problems after he has a full stomach.

Harry blinked owlishly, but dug around his robes and pulled out a pouch, from which he pulled out a gold coin. “I converted some of my gold…?”

The voice quirk user choked at the sight of the large and heavy gold coin while Shota’s eyebrow has gained a twitch that was becoming more and more refined in the way it twitched to show his varying levels of irritation. 

“You are not allowed to use any more of your alien gold.” Shota stated in a tone that his decision was final and Harry was not to overstep it.

“Ehhh…” 

“Too much of it will destabilize the economy.” Hizashi explained kindly, slightly more leery about his steak, but still ate it cheerfully.

“You said ‘too much’.” 

“Use it and I’ll turn you over to the police and you can live there for the rest of your life.”

“I can break out.”

“It’s the thought that counts, and when a man has enough drive, anything is possible.” the blond snickered.

———

Midoriya’s Observation Notebook

Harry 

Wizard (?) Alien (?)

Can turn into different sizes: the smallest observed was palm size

Can turn into a black cat, seems to have all functions of a cat

Can defy physics: Flying, turning an inorganic item into a living being

Super durable as proven during the Nomu event

Side comment: Aizawa-sensei seems to be losing the will to deal with Harry properly… 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am just slowly coasting along...


	6. Unneeded Commentary

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shota is done with Life.
> 
> And daddy problems are everywhere.

Today was going to be a bad day. Shota just knew it. No matter how much Harry assured everyone that everything was going to go as smooth as whip cream and brings satisfaction like a dump in the bathroom, anything that involves Harry Potter and the public meant problems. For him and no one else in the faulty.

Damn, he wants his sleeping bag.

"Hey, Shota! Hizashi said I would be in the announcer box with you two."

And some chloroform, except he didn't know if drugs worked the same way on an alien.

"Shota! We got a festival to get rolling!"

And some ear mufflers to drown out reality.

As if knowing his thoughts (his best friend probably did knowing him for so long), Hizashi gestured some more at him and he sighed, relenting to his fate.

The seats better be comfortable. If they spent more money on robots to test students than comfort for faculty, he was going to criticize everything to hell and back until the Principal got the memo and paid him for all his headaches and hard work for teaching the problem class.

Class 1-A was filled with so many extreme problem children solely because he was the one that could control them the best and give them the best smack of reality until it was hammered in their heads.

Bakugo was a good example. (He could now silence him with a single stare.)

Mineta another one. (The girls in class knows not to put up with his shit.)

And Todoroki the low-key one. (Because his father causes problems that causes problems to his kid now refusing to use his full potential. He was still waiting for the chance to smack reality into his head. Or anyone in class really. Less work for him.)

All Might wasn't in his class, nor was he a student but he might as well be Shota's problem child too. (Cleaning up after his abyssal class plans and basically acting as the stick to his carrot. Reality has already smacked All Might in the gut pretty hard but he wished to smack him with some cold, hard logic about teaching too.)

A hand touched his shoulder and he roused from his inner rant, looking over at Hizashi with no discernable change in his demeanor.

"We're about to start." Hizashi warned him as Harry settled to Shota's right. (Smart boy, being next to Hizashi in his announcer mode was basically a death sentence.)

And the camera was on as Hizashi settled into his starting pose.

"Hey! Pay attention audience! Swarm, mass media! This year's high school rodeo of adolescence that you all love, the U.A. Sports Festival, is about to begin, everybody! Are you ready?!" Harry added some shining special effects behind him because Hizashi was god and god needs to be shiny.

There was no doubt Shota wasn't going to get much of a say today, not with a guy who has a voice quirk right next to him and the hyper personality to match.

He could literally yell Voldemort into submission, how Harry would love to see it.

"It's time for the students to enter the first year stage!"

While Hizashi went on his introduction of the classes, Harry whispered to Shota.

"You want to make a bet?"

Shota gave him both questioning and wary eyes.

"I bet that daddy problems will pop up today." Harry raised a finger and tsked as he explained, "Because it is one of the most common trope in both life and fiction!"

"If you fool me once, shame on you. If you fool me twice, shame on me. I am not even going to start the shame cycle." Shota turned his eyes away and ignored Harry, who shrugged.

"Doesn't mean I won't say anything when it happens."

Yes, Shota knows this. He just hopes the disaster bringer wizard wasn't going make it worse than usual.

—

Before the events even started, one problem child was already causing Shota grief.

'Did I forget to tell him about preparing a speech?' Because what Bakugo gave was a declaration. But some of reality seems to be hammered into his head because he was awfully serious when he made it. Unlike his previous wide grins, he was very solemn about it.

There were some good benefit with the attack the other day.

(Whatever he tried to say as commentary was pushed aside and he wondered why he was even here. His opinion was only needed when Hizashi felt like it.)

"Oh, there's half-half. Right, didn't you say that he pissed off some other recommended kid before? I am going to bet daddy issues on him." Harry plastered himself against the window and Shota was very tempted to just smack him like one would do with a bug on your window. But he reigned in that urge and inwardly sighed as they watched the event go on.

He also agreed with Harry no matter how unfortunate it may be. If anybody in the class has a problem with their father, then Todoroki was the one. (Even his hero costume showed his dislike of his father.)

Daddy problems, how often do you come across a story where the mother is already gone? It's usually the dad that's gone, or both parents. Famous examples would be Pokemon, Harry himself (although both of his parents are gone, his father still died first so he fits both bills) and there's Midoriya himself… who is his dad? All they know is that his name is just slightly different from Hizashi's - Hisashi.

("Watch his dad be the last boss or relative to the last boss!" Harry had once spoken. Shota fervently prayed it wasn't the case. Perhaps it was a bit late to pray for a calm year, but he still did it.)

("The chances are too low but I still want to ask, you aren't Midoriya's dad are you?" Harry had once asked All Might, who coughed up blood in utter shock as he denied it with all his might. It made an interesting topic of discussion around the staff room at least.)

They watched Midoriya break the arm of a robot as Hizashi rattled on and on about everyone that was breaking and making it past the robots to their next hell - the Fall.

Harry was all in favor of the tone of regret in his voice while Shota glared at him with the heat of a thousand suns to shut his mouth. Forever if possible.

Shota has many regrets, one of them was being the one to get into contact with Harry. People say first come first serve all the time as if its a good thing, sometimes not being first is great. Like, being the first lab rat to some medicine in development is not a first anyone would want to experience willingly without a lot of hush money and signed documents.

"That's so uncool!" The urge to just slink back into his sleeping bag was greater than ever. Although Iida's idea wasn't bad… it just looked so stupid. If Ingenium questions him about it, he would pin all the blame on All Might. If it looks stupid but works, it is not stupid - yeah right. It just isn't stupid per say, but it still looks stupid.

Shota had been keeping watch over Harry from the corner of his eye the entire time no matter how dead he looked and felt. So when he saw the faint frown on the wizard's face, he was instantly on alert.

"What is it?" He whispered away from the mic.

Harry continued to frown and scratched his head. "Like… something bad is going to happen and negatively affect him… but the bad is not happening to him personally?"

Shota thought back to Ingenium again and his location. He quickly whipped out his phone to text the other hero a warning as well as the principal. Whether anything actually happened was up in the air.

"Oh, now he's getting blown up all over the mine. The two ahead are still duking it out. You guys shoulda installed some springs or something that shot them back to the starting line." That line was caught by the mic and students were in outrage.

"What?!"

"That is not fair!"

"Oho, an idea for next year." This was Present Mic shouting in excitement over everyone else.

Then the rest of the audience and students heard the sound of a thud and the screech of the mic. Shota spoke following the awkward silence.

"Don't mind them, keep going."

What happened?

(The class of 1-A guessed that their sensei probably smacked a book or something against the other two. Their guesses were rather close as Shota had used his scarf and gagged the two into submission.)

"Green boy is number one. I bet there's a penalty for being number 1. There's always a penalty!" Harry shouted excitedly much to Midoriya's horror.

Midnight just cracked her whip some more, but this time out of anger as Harry had stolen some of the fun.

"Ignoring the commentary, I will explain the rules!"

("Hey, I forgot to ask but, how many events are there?" )

("Three." Shota was ready for a break after this. He can power nap for ten minutes or so. "There's a break after this event with some games.")

("Speaking of games, the principal has given you permission to use your magic on students as long as it does not cause permanent damages and within the bounds of a game. YEAH!" Shota faded away as Hizashi and Harry plotted. Higher ups always make decisions for you without your input. The meaning of life is to be a lacky of fate, life, job, hobbies and necessities.)

"Work hard 1-A, or I'll put you guys through hell." Training hell of course, not paper hell. Because he would have to grade those papers too, that was just dropping a rock on his own foot.

"The event is starting, so can you two stop your plotting and get over here."

"Shota's pissed again."

"Does he like cat girls?"

"I will put you into a smoothie maker."

"Smooth Shota, real smooth."

The commentary everyone waited for was late by a couple minutes as a gory scene proceeded to happen behind the dark screen. Once they were back on live, Present Mic was all wrapped up like a mummy and Harry dangling like a rain doll.

Everyone wisely did not comment.


End file.
